Notes from Delhi: Little Miss Accident Prone

It’s one of those days, today.

This year alone, I’ve been hospitalized once, sprained my ankle twice and today I go and cut my hand on the exhaust fan.  I remember a lot of blood, feeling very numb and then blacking out briefly for a minute. My fingernails are shattered, there’s a dark clot formed on my finger and a lot of dried blood which I can’t scrape off. I don’t know why I feel it important to describe it to you. I think I want you to understand that I’m not making a big deal over a mere paper cut.

I don’t know if it was weeks of exam stress, all the blood or this being the proverbial straw on the camel’s back but I just slipped into the bluest of blue moods. After M sent for my meds, and seeing that I was a little upset gave me a huge hug, and left for work I curled into a foetal position sobbed like a baby.

Suddenly, I was a little tired of constantly looking out for myself. I wanted to rest my head on someone’s lap, have my head patted and just be comforted (nothing too profound. Just generic phrases of sympathy). I wanted to be looked after and I was feeling completely, utterly miserable and ashamedly ‘little girl in a big world-ish’.

 I was suddenly reminded of home. If this had happened back at home, my dad would have rushed me to our family doctor for a tetanus shot; my family doctor would have told me I’ve put on weight; my mum would have made soup; my grandmother would insist it was all evil eye and hide her worry by telling me about people who have died of similar incidents; the sibling would ply me with reading material and the cat would sit on my lap and purr my blues away.

It’s moments like this when I’m reminded that I’m so very alone in this country, devoid of any family or any kind of local guardian. At times of crisis; I don’t have anyone to fall back on. Of course, I’ve made some amazing friends, but I can’t keep relying on them all the time.

2011 doesn’t seem to be favouring me physically, I guess I need to have my game face on for the next few months and keep my fingers crossed.

 Rant over. I just  hope this horrible mood lifts soon and my hand heals in time for exams.

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26 thoughts on “Notes from Delhi: Little Miss Accident Prone

  1. Awwww Gutter!

    I’m so sorry to hear that. Please don’t feel too blue. And try to be more careful.

    Before you know it, you’ll be back with the family! In the meantime know that there are strangers out there that have a lot of affection for you and want you too look after yourself better! Especially because they want you in one piece should you ever vist London!

  2. Aiyo 😦 I hope the injury is not too serious? Fingernails will grow back and then u can paint them in multi colours like pseud0random does! 🙂 Bright colours make u happy if I’m not mistaken? Get well soon! Hug!

  3. what the.. an exhaust fan?!?

    i know that this is all a clever way of distracting yourself from the real issue, that is, your addiction to tv shows during exams..

    ENOUGH!! Stop hurting yourself to stay indoors and watch Glee!! 😛

    seriously though, that sounds nasty..

  4. Aww you poor thing! Hope it all heals up soon, and I totally agree with Cadence’s idea 😉

    Yeah it sucks to be alone in a strange place. I remember when I got my wisdom tooth taken out, I felt so rubbish. All I wanted was a hug and for my food to magically appear before me but I had absolutely no one (not even friends). You kinda get used to it.

    Sorry this isn’t helping…I guess I just wanted to let you know that I know how you feel *hug*

  5. Copying maddox on the hitcounter are we? 😛

    There’s always people on the internet to sympathize and tell you they know what you’re going through. 😀

    A blog’s a great vent that way!

    I broke my toenail recently in similar fashion. None of the horrible feeling though. Hope you feel better soon.

  6. I SO know what you mean. I’ve been in a similar blue mood, with thoughts along the same lines for the past few days as well. I have a bestfriend though, not too nearby, but close enough and my housemates are like really nice and from SL so it’s ok but still for the most part come hell or heaven I have to fend for myself. Ah well, all a part of the A,B,Cs of growing up right? 🙂 Hang in there. xx

    • It is 🙂 I’m actually a little ashamed that I’m being such a baby about this! I used to pride myself on being all aloof and Miss Independent and all. Guess, I’m not as hardcore as I thought I was.

  7. awww 😦 that sucks. i’m glad you cried though. good to let it out.
    pls take your meds on time and remember there are people sending love your way.
    i wish i could bring you cookies like you did when i broke my leg but since i cant i’ll bake some and send you pics? no? okay 🙂 love you.

  8. Ow ow, that sounds horrid.

    Hope you get better soon, treat yourself to some chocolate, always lifts my mood. Especially if its good chocolate.

    Good luck, and cheer up.

  9. Awwww 😦 how absolutely miserable! 😦
    Okay not helping

    *BIG HUG* hope you feel better soon. It’ll all be over in no time 🙂

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