>Bills, Bills, Bills

 

Dah-ling,

We’ve been watching you.

We’ve been watching you for quite some time actually. We watched as you progressed and grew day by day. From a passive passer-by content with window shopping to a frenzied addict, to whom words like ‘50% off’ and ‘Year end Sale!’ could send shivers down your spine.

And we must tell you that we like what we see.

We watched you as you weaved expertly from one store to another. We watched you as you would come home at night and stare at your purse with a bemused look on your face. We saw you buy that beeyootiful red handbag. We were also there when you left the same handbag in the tuk-tuk you rode in.

We decided to enroll you after seeing you on Sunday night, perched on your bed; mars bar in one hand, pencil in the other, surrounded by receipts of every shape and colour. Receipts for multiple tops, trousers slippers, flip-flops (the same pair in three colours. We’re impressed), coloured stoles, handbags, cloth bags, stationary, books, comics, DVD’s you don’t remember purchasing, countless earrings, beads, wire, art paper, restaurant bills (you eat far too much by the way) underwear, tubes of paint, more books, yet more tops, those coloured pebbles you love collecting, food, glassware, ribbons, medicine and err… well you get our drift.

We heaved our bosoms and surveyed you with a combination of maternal pride and pleasure as you stared helplessly, guilt-ridden and dejected, at the mounting pile of bills at your feet.

You are now truly one of us. We look forward to seeing more of you in the year 2009. Welcome to the sisterhood. Have a very merry Christmas.

Yours in all things plastic,

Shopoholics Anonymous.